Friday, April 20, 2012

Guess What? You ARE a Geek.

As those of you who follow me on facebook and twitter know, I'm producing and performing in a geek themed burlesque called "GeekShow" tomorrow night at the Triple Nickel Tavern ( Well, during the months leading up to the show, I have heard several of my fellow Peaks and Pasties ( proclaim, with some small pride, "I guess I'm just not geeky." Guess what? You are.

Here's the deal- I'm willing to bet that almost everyone reading this blog has some geek in them. And those who can't reconcile with their inner geek are probably too busy hulking out on steroids and trying to figure out how to punch me through the computer. "Blane smash. Me need more Monster Energy Drink* to beat up dorky art girl...." *Replace "Monster Energy Drink" with "Sparks" or "Meth," as you see appropriate.

So basically what I'm saying is that if you don't have a little bit of Geek in you, then there's a good chance that you have a lot of Douchebag in you. And I don't mean this to be condescending. It is just my experience that those with the ability to empathize and care for others, often have interests in the Geek Arts.

And there are so many geeky things out there! One of them is bound to apply to you. Your geek journey begins here. We welcome you.

Here's a few that I can list:

SCI FI: Yes, I believe that this one is at the top of the list. This category includes all space related movies, TV shows and books: Star Wars (of course), Star Trek, Battlestar Galactica, Dr. Who, X-Files, etc. There are far too many to mention. But, chances are, if you are into...I mean, really into Sci Fi, then you have some geek in you.

TECHIES/COMPUTER DORKS: Yes, we all know the stereotypical "computer nerd." He/she might be an IT person, programmer, or weird manacle genius. But, I believe you are also a Techy geek if you look forward to the new Apple iphone, ipad, i-whatever. If you HAVE to pick up every single "gadgety" thing you see in a store, then you are probably a geek. AND, you don't even have to know a lot about computers to be a Techy. My husband has to have every new gadget available, but I will ruin him if we are put head to head on a spreadsheet building competition. In fact, I will ruin you all.  But this isn't about me. Bottom line, you don't have to write code to be a Techy geek. Most likely, if you are a consumer, then you are a techy.

COMIC BOOKS: Oh yeah. This is a big one. Liking almost ALL comic books makes you a geek...except liking Archie comic books...that makes you a serial killer. I only need two words to prove my point that comic books are geeky: COMIC CON. (And yes, I know that Comic Con isn't just about comic books, but cool-out nerds...I'm trying to help you). Comic Con brings me to a very good point: chances are that if what you are into has an annual convention, it is probably geeky.

REN FAIR/LORD OF THE RINGS/GAME OF THRONES/ANYTHING MEDIEVAL: I'm guessing that I caught a whole bunch of you here. If what you are into involves dragons, pan flute music, chain mail, wizardry and elves/imps, then "Huzzah!" you are a geek.

D&D: Do I really need to explain why this is geeky?

STEAMPUNK: Yep. It involves history, technology, time-travel and costumes. Face it. That shit is super geeky. Now, take your goggles off...I know you can't read properly with those on.

GAMERS: So, I'm going to wager that the people I didn't get with "Medieval" and "Steampunk" will have to concede to this category. Do you play World of Warcraft? Halo? Or whatever new game it is that keeps you from leaving the house. Hi, Geek.

MISC: Here's where I really get you all- if you are VERY into one thing and are incredibly "schooled" on the subject and it places you a little bit out of the mainstream, then I welcome you to the Geek Alliance. These geeky subjects might include, but are not limited to: theatre, film (my favorite), science, math, philosophy, grammar (my second favorite), role play, cosplay (furries? anime? you know you dig it), historical re-inactment, stamps and/or money collecting, literature, Harry Potter, vampires (aka Dark Shadows), horror, antiques, etc. Basically, anything that takes up a great deal of your time....and you are slightly ashamed to admit that you enjoy it so much.

So there it is. Are you a Geek? If so, please come to our GeekShow tomorrow night! If you are not a Geek, then you should probably go back to the set of The Jersey Shore....

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